I was spinning fast. I closed my eyes to avoid getting dizzy.
Then I fell. I stood still to readjust myself. I still felt wobbly and out of sorts.
I was in a different place. A bright light captured my attention and I knew that I was supposed to follow it.
The closer I got, the brighter it became. Human reflex would have caused my eyes to close…but now that I was just a spirit, I could stare into the light with no problem.
Soon the lights were all around me and were impossibly bright. I suddenly knew where I was heading. I could feel it from the bottom of my soul. I was heading toward the spiritual realm. I ran.
Finally, I had arrived. As I entered, I felt myself changing. I no longer had a ghostly appearance. I looked like I used to look before I died.
I walked until I spotted a lone figure…a woman, a very young woman.
“Desirae?” I asked, although I was one hundred percent sure who she was.
“Where am I…why am I here?” She asked, not confirming who she was.
“You are in the spiritual realm. I’m sorry Desirae…you are dead.”
She turned forward. “Oh yeah,” she said as if it were just a minor detail that she had forgotten.
“Why are you here?” She asked.
“Your mother…she-” I started.
“Momma?” Desirae said perking up.
“I’m supposed to bring you to her,” I said.
I waited for Desirae to stand up, turn and face me.
“Bring me back? How? Will I be alive again?”
“I’m sorry sweetie. You won’t be alive, but you could see your mom again.”
“As a ghost?” She asked, sounding defeated.
“Sort of. Your mom probably won’t be able to see you or hear you…but you’d be there.”
“But what’s the point of that? I wouldn’t really be back.”
“Your mom is looking for closure. She wants to know how you really died.”
I continued, “I’m supposed to take you back to her, so that you can tell her what happened.”
“No,” Desirae whispered. “I don’t want her to know.”
“She can’t know what happened…it’s too horrible.”
I could understand Desirae’s hesitation. I could only imagine the horrors that went through my own mom and granny’s mind when they heard how I died. But at least they knew exactly what happened to me.
“If you don’t tell her, she will go the rest of her life wondering. Is that what you want?” I asked as gently as I could trying not to sound as if I were scolding her.
Desirae did not answer, but I could tell by the look on her face that I had gotten to her. I offered my hand. “Will you come with me?”
I turned to leave. Before I could take a step, I felt Desirae’s soft hand slide into mine.
I had no idea how we would leave this realm, but I decided that I would walk on faith. I knew that if I did that, we’d both find our way back to the realm of the living.
There was no sense of time where we were. We just walked in what appeared to be an endless space. We did not tire. I led and Desirae just trusted that I would get her back to her mother.
I could feel that we were almost there, when I felt a tug as Desirae hesitated. “What will I feel when I return?” She asked.
I thought about it for a while before giving her an answer. “Nothing,” I said.
