I’m flying too close to the sun because the colors are brighter there. I can feel the intense heat, and it’s becoming uncomfortable. I know it’ll only lead to me either burning up or falling, but the temptation of seeing just how much closer I can get is irresistible. This is how I justify still being in Sulani on Monday morning, rather than in Britechester for school.
I busy myself with collecting water and digging around for trash to keep myself from staring at Mr. C…who’s busy cleaning trash out of the water today. Harper approaches me unexpectedly.
Harper: Hey, I was just about to do some diving. Want to join me?
I know that she and Miles are close, so I figure she’s nice to me because of him. I guess I’m okay with that.
Prosperity: Sure, but I know nothing about diving.
Harper: That’s okay. We won’t go too deep. The spot is a bit far off, though, so we’ll have to take water jets.
Prosperity: Water jets! Sounds fun.
Harper attempts to show me how they work, but I hop on and figure it out on my own.
We arrive at the diving spot and climb off the jets.
Prosperity: What will we be looking for?
Harper: Nothing today. I just want you to get the feel of it.
Harper shows me how to use some of the diving equipment and helps me get familiar with it. Then we go under.
My stomach sinks, and I feel the familiar hues of regret when I return to camp and get a call from Byron. I honestly do care for him, and my intention is not to hurt him, but if he finds out about me and Mr. C…that’s exactly what’s going to happen. I’m not sure whether I should tell him or continue to hide it. The promise ring on my finger feels extra heavy as I answer the call and bring the phone to my ear.
Prosperity: *on the phone* Hi Byron…
Byron: *on the phone* Peri! I miss you and wish you were here.
Byron fills me in on his college classes at Foxbury and about his new roommate.
Byron: It’s so overwhelming. My classes don’t seem to be too hard, but the campus feels so big at times.
My self-reproach is parasitic and threatens to eat me from the inside out. I want to tell him…to possibly break things off with him, but he has enough to deal with. If I tell him…I could be responsible for him not doing well during his first semester of school. But I can’t continue to hold this inside…
Prosperity: Byron…there’s something I need to tell you.
Byron: I know Peri. Don’t worry. I realize that you need more time. I can’t wait until you’re here with me, but I’m a patient man.
A punch in the gut. How am I supposed to be okay with breaking his heart? I completely chicken out.
Prosperity: Thank you. I don’t want to make any promises –
Byron: Then don’t.
A deep sigh escapes, which Byron completely misinterprets…
Byron: I miss you too. But, take your time. If I don’t see you here, maybe I’ll see you back at home…or in Sulani.
Prosperity: Yeah…maybe. *pause* Uh…go study. I’ll talk to you tomorrow.
Byron says his goodbyes, and we end the call.
Why does this have to be so complicated? Everyone else here at camp seems to enjoy a carefree existence, but my choices have led me to this pit of dark cloudy shame. I carry my burdens to the easel, hoping to paint them away.
I let my brush guide me, and I release all of my feelings on the canvas. The result is just as conflicted as I am. But it’s slightly therapeutic, so there’s that.
Feeling bold, I walk up to Mr. C, who’s sitting at the chess table alone. He looks up at me surprised.
Craig: Miss Banks…
Prosperity: Don’t Miss Banks me.
Craig: Uh…how may I help you?
I sit down across from him and begin resetting the board.
Prosperity: You can drop the formalities, Craig. I’m not going to put up with you acting like what happened between us didn’t happen.
Craig: *hushed, urgent tone* So you want to announce it to everyone and cause a stir?
Prosperity: No, but I’m not going to hide from it either. *makes a move on the board* Your turn.
Craig: As I said…it’s over. We can’t continue our liaisons.
Prosperity: Let’s call it what it is. Woohoo…you say you want to stop woohooing me, but I don’t believe you. You want it just as much as I do.
Craig: *deep sigh* You are not making this easy.
Prosperity: Good…because it stopped being easy as soon as you pulled down your pants.
I make one last, potentially winning move before I get up from the table and grab a serving of the meal that Keith just finished preparing.
(Generation 2 Chapter Summaries)
