Banks Dynasty – Day 18.2

I’m grateful for a full night’s sleep and a quiet morning. I have a few moments to think of only myself, and I attempt to enjoy it to the fullest. I start with a decent breakfast and even take the time to workout.

Just as I’m beginning to work up a nice sweat, Kai steps out of his bedroom. My “me” time is over, so I take him to his highchair, knowing that food is the first thing he’ll ask for. I think I’m getting the hang of this toddler thing.

I give Kai a serving of the pancakes that I made earlier. I know my cooking skill isn’t the best yet, so I apologize before he even takes his first bite.

Prosperity: I don’t know if you’ll like these, but bear with me. I promise it’ll get better.

Kai stares at me, so I don’t know if he understands or not. I sort of drown the pancakes in syrup to mask the taste. He eats about half, then begins to whine, looking to get out of his high chair.

I take a quick shower and get dressed for the day. Kai walks into his bedroom and runs straight to the giant bear from Father Winter. He practically tackles it trying to give it a big hug. I hate to interrupt his love fest, but I really need him to sit on the potty before he spoils his diaper.

After he’s used the potty and I’ve changed him out of his pajamas, he goes right back to the bear and babbles away. I can only understand about half of what he says. It’s time to teach him how to talk.

I lead him into the living room where there are fewer distractions and begin to enunciate some basic words that I overheard him trying to use. He’s all in at first, but after about 15 minutes, he begins to stare with glazed-over eyes. That’s okay; I have a secret weapon. I pull out his tablet, which I’ve equipped with a new language app. He doesn’t hesitate to sit down and continue his lesson with it.

With Kai occupied, I step out the door quickly, intending to check the mail. Instead, I’m distracted by some wrapped gifts that have been left on the porch. Afu is at the bottom of the steps looking like he’s leaving for or returning from a workout. There’s no way these gifts are from him. I grab them and carry them inside. There’s not much to indicate who they are for, but there’s a small label on one of them. It says, “from cc.” Could they be from Craig?

My heart skips a beat as I open the biggest box. I pull out a nice digital sketchpad. It’s a surprisingly thoughtful gift, mainly because I don’t have room for an easel. It has to be from Craig. It’s not a secret that he admired my art.

I give Kai the box with the child-friendly wrapping paper. There’s a toy train in it, but it’s not brand new. It looks like something a collector would have. Maybe even something that would be passed down within a family. There’s one last tiny box, which contains a lump of clay. I’m guessing that was intended for Kai as well.

Prosperity: I think these might be from your father.

The words are out of my mouth before I’ve had a chance to give them any real thought. Should I be bringing Craig up to Kai, not knowing if Kai will ever get a chance to meet him?

Kai: Fatha Winta?

I decide not to correct him.

Prosperity: Yes, Father Winter.

Kai returns to his speaking app, and I sit next to him, too bored with knitting to pull out my kit. I take out the digital sketch pad instead, but my mind isn’t really on painting. It’s on Craig. Colors of uncertainty have surrounded my thoughts of him for a long time, and this incident doesn’t make it any better. When was he here? If he came all this way, why would he leave without at least attempting to meet his son?

Craig is a mystery that I’ll never quite unravel and sometimes I wonder if it’s worth it to try. I focus on what’s right in front of me and that’s Kai, the only piece of Craig that I have that is pure and untainted in the deep colors of shame and regret that he and I created. I give Kai a bath and tuck him into bed.

Dinner is ramen once again. For some reason, this simple meal brings back vivid memories of my days in Sulani, my days with Craig. I can almost feel his arms around me, his bare skin pressed against mine during those warm summer nights. I can even hear the waterfall that fell around us our first time together. It makes me wonder if I’ll ever feel that sort of passion with anyone again. Or will revisiting those moments be the only way?

(Generation 2 Chapter Summaries)