It’s time. Peri can feel death approaching as sure as she can feel the floor below her. She gets up to greet it, although fear threatens to paralyze her in place. If only she could see her family one more time. But it’s too late. She doesn’t even reach the door before collapsing to the ground.
Her last thought is, ‘Mommy and daddy, I’m coming to join you.’ Then, death comes and swiftly sweeps away her soul.
I wake up to a sunken feeling in the pit of my gut. Something isn’t right. I can feel it swooshing through the air around me. I need to check on ma. I get up, put on my clothes, and begin to walk, but my feet don’t carry me to ma’s room. So instead, I go outside because the chickens need me – or maybe I need them more than I’ve ever needed anything before. I need them to distract me from facing what I know is true.
After I’ve done everything I possibly can for the chickens and much more than I need to – I finally make my way to ma’s bedroom. Her energy has departed; I know it long before I see the urn sitting on the floor at the foot of her bed. Sobs riddle through my entire body.
I don’t know how I manage, but I make my way back to the bedroom, where Me-Me is still asleep. I need her. I don’t know if I can function without her right now. She stirs awake as soon as I sit down on the bed.
Melisa: *groggy voice* Kai? Is everything okay?
My voice is small and barely audible, but somehow she hears me.
Kai: It’s ma. She’s gone.
Gone can mean so many things, and at this moment, I’d give anything for it to mean anything else. But Me-Me knows the precise context of ‘gone.’ She pauses for a moment, her body visibly sinking at the side of the bed. Then she gathers herself, gets up, and sits next to me, trying to contain her emotions.
I can’t take it. I don’t want to believe any of this, although ma warned me that I needed to prepare for this moment. So I get up from the bed seeking something to do in this most helpless of situations.
Kai: I have to tell the boys.
Me-Me is up in a flash beside me. She takes me into her arms.
Melisa: I’ll do it. I’ll tell them, Kaby.
And I realize that I need her to because I can’t. I can’t face them like this. I don’t want to see their sunken faces and the tears as their hearts break. Not right now.
Kai: Okay, I have to call Uncle Merit, though. He needs to know right away.
I pull out my phone and dial his number, but he doesn’t answer. I put the phone away.
Melisa: I’ll call work and tell them I won’t come in today. Then I’ll take care of the boys.
Me-Me goes into the bathroom to get dressed. I slump down in a chair as my phone rings. It’s Aunt Roni. It takes a while before I have the strength to answer.
Dub gets out of bed and goes downstairs, expecting someone to be in the kitchen making breakfast. But, besides Mase, it’s empty, and no food is on the counters. So he guesses that gran must have slept in. As he walks to the refrigerator, Mase approaches, holding a stack of dirty dishes.
Mason: The dishes from last night were still in the sink.
Wade: That’s weird. I thought daddy and gran washed them last night. Oh well. Just put them in the dishwasher.
Mase starts loading the dishwasher while Dub searches the refrigerator for leftovers to warm up.
Dub warms up the fish from last night and sits down to eat it as his ma comes slowly down the stairs.
Melisa: Uh, Dubbie. I have something that I need to tell you.
Wade: What’s going on, ma? Where’s gran and dad?
Melisa: I’m so sorry, son. Your gran has passed away.
Wade: *emotional* What? When?
Mase walks over, holding his plate.
Mason: *sad and confused* What does ‘passed away’ mean?
Me-Me addresses Dub’s question.
Melisa: We don’t know when exactly. But your dad found her this morning.
Mason: *urgent tone* What does passed away mean, mommy?!
Melisa: It means she died, Mase.
With shaky hands, Mase hurries to put his plate down but ends up dropping his food on the floor before he can.
Mason: *quivering lips* Daddy said gran would die, but I didn’t know it would be today.
Mase says this as if it’s all his fault.
Melisa: None of us did, honey.
Mase tries hard to contain his emotions. Me-Me encourages him to let it out.
Melisa: It’s okay to cry. We’ll all be doing a lot of crying. There is no reason to be ashamed.
As if waiting for permission, Mase places his head in his hand and bursts into tears.
Mason: *between sobs* I don’t want gran to be dead!
Melisa: I know, sweetheart.
Wade: What can we do – to help dad?
Melisa: We can be there for him. We need to support him and do whatever we can to lighten his load for the next few days. Okay?
Wade and Mason: *together* Okay, ma
(Generation 3 Chapter Summaries)
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