I’m sitting in my office, staring at the blank computer screen, thinking about everything Maia said. Her words, “I don’t think we will make it…” cause my insides to soften into jelly. I really messed up this time, and my words and declarations of love weren’t enough to fix it. I have to do something…change something. But where do I start? Maybe I need to talk to Luca, or should I call Dad?
A loud crash from the hallway, followed by Maia crying out, shatters my thoughts and jolts me into action. I’m out of my chair and hurrying through the door before I realize it.
Clyde is lying on the floor right outside of my office, and Maia is bawling. It takes a minute for my mind to comprehend what I’m seeing. Where did Clyde come from? I thought he went home, but he’s here in our hallway, his body stiff or, more accurately…lifeless. Is he…dead?
The presence of death, screams, and sobbing fills the room. I’m rooted in place, unsure what to do or who to comfort. The old man was a pain in the butt, but I don’t want this. The reality of his death makes my stomach contents churn with unease, and, to my surprise, I can feel the tears coming.
Maia puts her hands together, pleading:
Maia: Please don’t take him! Not now… I need more time.
Death: His time has run out. You can claim his body, but I am taking his soul.
Maia slumps in defeat, the tears falling as her body trembles with grief. Seeing her this way snaps me out of my paralysis. She needs me, and once again, I’m failing her.
I pull Maia to the side while Death handles its business.
Wade: Maia, babe-I’ve got you! Everything is going to be okay.
Maia looks helpless, like an innocent child.
Maia: He’s gone, Dub. My father is gone.
Wade: I know, but I’m here for you.
Maia: We… what do we do? Who do we call? His friends? A funeral?
Maia is withering before me. I straighten my back and look her directly in the eyes on autopilot…not thinking, not planning, not fixing—just being here for my family.
Wade: I know, baby. Let me take care of all of that. I’ve got this. You see about Tami. I’ll make all the phone calls.
Maia: Are you sure?
Wade: Of course! I’ll do all of it. Take Tami upstairs.
Maia slowly climbs the stairs while I stare at the spot where Clyde’s lifeless body was moments ago. I can barely catch my breath because a massive lump in my throat blocks it.
Maia gently leads Tami up the stairs and into her bedroom.
Tambara: What happened, Mommy? Why did Grandpa fall asleep in the hallway? Why are you crying?
Maia: Grandpa didn’t fall asleep, Tadpole. He died, just like Luna.
Tambara: And like the leaves?
Maia: Yeah, like the leaves. I’m crying because I’m sad and I’ll miss him.
Tambara: Just like we miss Luna? Was Grandpa too old like Luna?
Maia: Yes, baby… Grandpa was old, like Luna. But guess what?
Tambara: What?
Maia: We’ll be very sad for a while, maybe a long time, but I’ll also be happy because I have you.
Tambara: And Daddy?
Maia: Yes… and Daddy. Do you want a hug?
Tami nods and scoots over, settling in her mother’s arms.
Maia: I love you, Tadpole.
Tami’s answer is a soft sob.
I take Clyde’s urn into my office, out of Maia and Tami’s sight. Then, I write a quick social bunny post to let as many people as possible know what is happening. The sadness of Clyde’s passing blindsides me. I’m going to miss his snide words and his angry glances. I feel bad for every negative thing that I ever said or thought about him. He didn’t like me, but that’s because he loved his daughter until his last breath. His entire purpose was to protect her as I should…as I should protect Tami. I can learn from Clyde. I didn’t protect Maia today. My words hurt her. Maybe Clyde was right not to like me. I don’t deserve Maia.
I can’t take back what I’ve said and done, but I can do whatever I can to ease Maia’s burdens. I open my computer and begin searching for instructions on planning a funeral. The Banks family cemetery is in Willow Creek. Clyde was my family, so he deserves to be there. Maia would like that, and maybe Clyde would, too.
Maia sits alone in her bedroom, trying to pull her broken pieces back together. Clyde was tough and raised her to be the same. Death is nothing new; she’s been through this before. Clyde wore the grief of her mother passing like armor. Maybe it’s time to shine up her own.
Maia gets up from the bed, feeling brave and strong, reminding herself that everything will be okay. Life goes on. Her self-talk works long enough to get her on her feet and out of the bedroom, but by the time she gets to the kitchen, she slips right back into the emotional well of grief. She’s not okay, and she can’t pretend to be.
I can hear Maia’s crying from downstairs. I hurry into the kitchen.
Wade: I’m here, babe. I’m here, and I’m so sorry that you’re going through this.
Maia responds by taking a step closer and allowing me to take her in my arms. Her warm tears wet my shoulder, but I stand there holding her for an unmeasured amount of time. Eventually, the tears stop, and we separate.
Maia: I need to make a few calls.
Wade: Need me to do that for you?
Maia: No, I’ve got it.
Wade: Okay, I’ll check on Tami.
I leave the kitchen and find Tami standing in the hallway.
Wade: Are you okay, Princess?
Tambara: I don’t know.
Tambara: Is everyone going to die, Daddy?
I want to lie and say no. How do I answer without being too macabre? I’ve done enough damage today. How would Luca handle it? What about my dad?
Wade: Eventually, because death is a part of life. But there’s no need to be afraid.
Tambara: Why not?
Wade: Because being alive is great! And our job is to live and do as much as possible while we’re here.
Tambara: Did Grandpa do that?
Wade: I think so… and I think Luna did, too.
Tami thinks about that for a while.
Tambara: That’s why Luna sometimes went missing.
Wade: Yep. She was out living her best life!
It’s time for bed, but I imagine Tami will find sleeping challenging after all the day’s events. Starting her bedtime routine may help.
Wade: Should we read a bedtime story?
Tami nods.
I scan Tami’s shelf and choose a book carefully. As much as we love fantasy books, it’s no secret that they are often full of death and hard times. I want something light and cheerful. I choose a book and sit down. Tami looks over at her new cat.
Tambara: Majesty sleeps too much and is not that much fun.
Wade: She’s still a baby. You slept a lot when you were a baby, too. She’ll be more fun when she grows up.
As I read, Tami sits on the bed, but even hearing one of her favorite stories doesn’t cheer her up.
Wade: Do you want to try getting some sleep?
Tami nods.
I help Tami into her pajamas and tuck her into bed. Maia is also in bed when I enter our bedroom to check in on her. But she’s tossing and turning from restless sleep. And it’s no wonder because so much has happened in this house over the last few days. The strife and grief is overwhelming. Maybe there’s something I can do about that. I head downstairs to check on a few possibilities.
(Generation 4 Chapter Summaries)
Thanks for reading! Please hit the “like” button if you’ve enjoyed what you read! Keep scrolling if you’d like to leave a comment. 🥰
Be First to Comment