It’s 2 am, the morning of Me-Me’s funeral, and Kai finds it impossible to sleep on the couch, in the bed, or anywhere else in the house. While wandering the upstairs hallway, he hears his granddaughter Serena whining quietly in her room. She’s the perfect distraction. Kai walks in and lifts her out of her crib.
Kai: Hey there, little darling. Pop-Pop’s got you!
It’s time for Serena’s bottle, so Kai gives it to her, allowing her parents time to sleep in. After burping her and checking that she’s clean and dry, Kai places her back in her crib.
Kai: There you are! It’s time to get your beauty sleep. Thanks for keeping me company.
Kai stands and watches his granddaughter until her little eyes finally close.
After a nearly sleepless night, I climb out of bed and head to the kitchen to help prepare breakfast—a task usually reserved for those with more cooking experience. But the least I can do is make eggs and bacon.
Dad comes downstairs just as I finish mixing the eggs with seasonings.
Wade: How’d you sleep?
He sits at the counter as I move over to the stove.
Kai: I didn’t.
Wade: Yeah, me either.
Which is true. I spent half the night tossing and turning and the other half trying to occupy my thoughts by scrolling through social media, desperate to keep my tears at bay.
I finish preparing breakfast and place the hot meal on the counter. Moments later, Zoe comes downstairs, already dressed for the funeral, and grabs a plate.
Mase comes down the stairs holding Serena. They are both dressed in black with pink accessories in remembrance of Ma’s favorite color.
Mase puts Serena down on her play mat, and she immediately starts crying—much like Tami used to when she was a baby. Dad, being a typical doting Pop-Pop, steps in.
Kai: You eat, Mase. I’ve got her.
Dad picks Serena up from the mat and gently bounces her in his arms until she calms down.
Once Zoe finishes her breakfast, Dad walks over with Serena, looking reluctant to hand her over.
Kai: I know I can never replace my wife, but if you ever need help with her, please let me know.
Zoe takes Serena in her arms.
Zoe: Thanks, Dad. I will.
She pauses, staring down at her daughter.
Zoe: It sucks that she won’t remember her gran when she’s older.
Kai: Yeah. That’s a shame. But as long as I’m alive, I’ll tell her everything she’d ever want to know about her.
Zoe: I’d love that.
Dad stands there, searching for something more to say. He’s visibly shaken, lost in thought about Ma. Finally, he seems to snap out of his trance.
Kai: I’d better get dressed for the *pauses* thing today.
Dad says it but doesn’t move for a couple of minutes. He’s stalling—and I can’t blame him.
There’s no more avoiding the inevitable. Today is about celebrating Ma, and we can’t be late. The family—minus Serena, who stays with a babysitter—loads into the car and makes our way to Willow Creek Cemetery, where we’ve said goodbye to loved ones for generations.
The first thing I do is enter the family tomb—and immediately regret it. Seeing Ma’s picture up on that wall above her urn overwhelms me. The space has always been hot and stuffy, but today the air feels even heavier, pressing against my chest. I struggle to breathe in enough of it to satisfy my lungs. The finality of this place makes my stomach sink. Seeing Ma’s picture and the empty pedestals standing guard along the walls—waiting for more pictures and urns—reminds me that one day, we’ll all be here. I don’t stay long. I’ll save this visit for a time when I feel stronger. Today is not that day.
As I step outside, Maia and Tami arrive. Dad’s face lights up when he sees them, and he pulls Tami into a long, tight hug.
I stand back and stare at Maia for a few moments. Despite the pain on her face, she looks incredible—her body shapely and well-toned. I can tell she’s been working out. Her skin glows with a healthy gleam.
All this time, I’ve been trying to figure out how to get her back, but now I wonder if she’d even want that. Maybe her life is better without me in it.
She meets my eyes with a sympathetic smile, giving my legs the permission they need to move. I slowly walk over, and she doesn’t hesitate to pull me into her arms. If I could melt into her and stay that way forever, I would. Being near her feels so good.
Maia: *whispers* I’m so sorry, Dub.
She steps back, taking her warmth with her, and I notice her eyes—red and swollen from crying.
Maia: Losing Me-Me is heartbreaking.
I know she’s not just speaking for me—she feels it, too. And she’s right. But in my head, I include her in that sentence as well, because I feel like I’m on the brink of losing two very important women in my life.
I eventually pull myself away from Maia and make my way over to Tami. I’ve missed my daughter so much over these last few days, and I have just enough time to embrace her and tell her as much before the ceremony begins.
Dad has appointed me to take the lead and direct the funeral proceedings. I walk over to the podium.
Wade: Thank you all for coming to this celebration of Ma. Please bow your heads for a moment of silence.
We say our silent prayers. Then Dad steps up to speak. He struggles to compose himself, wiping away a few tears as he finds his words.
After some time, Dad takes a deep breath and begins.
Kai: Nothing I say will ever be enough to express how much I love this woman. She entered my life like a whirlwind, clearing away the mess that was me and leaving in its place someone new—someone ready to face a lifetime with her. My Pop-Pop died shortly after I met her, and she taught me how to grieve while still giving myself permission to seek happiness. But I never thought I’d be standing here today, trying to use what she taught me to cope with losing her.
Dad pauses, taking another deep breath.
Kai: I stand here as a man who no longer knows how to breathe because she was my oxygen. I’ve forgotten how to smile because she was the source of my joy. Her beauty was beyond measure—she was my sunset. Her kindness and laughter filled our home, and her happiest days were spent filling that home with family, friends, and loved ones.
Kai: *continues* I am broken without her, but I know she would want me to live on and find joy in the memories we built together. I will carry my love for her with me until the day I see her again. I am grateful for our sons, our daughters, and our grandchildren because a piece of her will always live on in them.
Kai: *concludes* Thank you, Melisa Brown-Banks, for being my life partner. I don’t know how I will carry on without you, but I promise to take it one day at a time. I will always love you. Goodbye for now, my beautiful angel.
We all fight through tears after hearing Dad’s words. He concludes his eulogy, lights a candle in remembrance of Ma, and opens the podium to anyone who wishes to speak. Our cousin Terra rises, picks up the guitar resting nearby, and begins to play. Then Maia steps forward, sharing how much Ma meant to her over the years, echoing Dad’s words about her kindness while wiping away several tears.
Finally, the most challenging part of the ceremony is over. I sit down next to Mase and officially meet Dray’s girlfriend, Mariana, who is breathtakingly beautiful. No wonder he was ready to give up his life in Simerica for her. We chat for a moment, getting to know her, before Dad calls me over to light the memorial cannon.
(Generation 4 Chapter Summaries)
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